Why?

My sister just left on Sunday-she was here for 10 days. It was super fun to have her around, but definetly makes the busy life schedule busier. We went to the coast for the day..to see Redwoods and Patricks point..hence the picture..it was good times...not sure when I'll see her again so I'm glad that she got to hang for a bit.

So the message on Sunday was about encouragement and it was very much needed. Not just for myself but for a ton of people there. But I needed encouragment for sure. I had one of those weeks that I needed to get out of with help. Just plain depressing, discouraging, and constantly being reminded that I'm in Redding and I still don't know why? Constantly being asked why Redding? and not having an answer..not really...just simply because I know its where I'm supposed to be. Why my job? Why work there when its so tiring and long? I don't know-its what was given me...after hearing why for so long and having your life questioned so much makes a person seriously doubt the realities that aretheir life. Being questioned at to what I'm doing is not new for me. I have a track record for doing crazy things that look completely random from the outside. To those that really know me and who really know God..there is no question..but for the majority of my life, I have constantly been asked "Why?" This question can be seriously annoying, but not only that completely discouraging. The doubts behind the question always seem to infiltrate when I'm not watching and led me to doubt as well, to fell discouraged, annoyed and questioning the present. I want to be a live in the present type person but its really hard when you aren't feeling good in it. So yes, I do need to surround myself with armor bearers, encouragers, who know that even though my life doesn't make sense in the realities of life, my life does makes sense in the journey that God has me on.....and to encourage me on that path.

And so of course..I read John 10 last night and for those that don't know it...its good..real good...

"3The watchman opens the gate for him, and the sheep listen to his voice. He calls his own sheep by name and leads them out. 4When he has brought out all his own, he goes on ahead of them, and his sheep follow him because they know his voice... 14"I am the good shepherd; I know my sheep and my sheep know me— 15just as the Father knows me and I know the Father—and I lay down my life for the sheep."

I know the sheep and the sheep know me...to be in such intimate relationship with the Lord to know when he's calling me out and what it sounds like..its always been the desire of my heart...

All that to say..thanks for those that have encouraged me lately..I needed it greatly and hope that I will repay it soon:)