Lately...I really have been busy. Work is work. People are people. And days just seem to go by and seriously how is it the 21st of October? I'm not really OK with the fact that its almost 2013. Mostly just because I feel my life is flashing before my eyes and I'm wondering if I'm making the most of it. Most days the answer is, no.
Lately..I hate reading the news. Here are today's article titles:
"Clashes follow Lebanon funeral"
"Eleven killed in attack in Iraq"
"Deadly crashes in Gaddafi Bastion"
"Israel intercepts Gaza bound boat"
"Syrian car bomb targeted police station"
Most of these countries border mine and I have dear friends in all of them...and yet lately. I sit. in peace. hating. mourning. wondering. what will happen next? and praying. it will get better.
I was driving today---thinking about life. about my life here. about my job. wishing for things to be different, wishing for things I don't have (I'm an Enneagram 4--it's apparently what we do a lot). But then I wondered...a year from now...will I come back? will I be able to come back? I hope and pray this country will stay stable, but I realized...you just never know. and that was a weird realization....sometimes. in the peace bubble. you forget that life as you know it can easily get interrupted.
Lately...I was given an ounce of hope. Apparently I didn't realize...I had reached and run on empty. That ounce brought me back to life---full life? no. but enough to keep going. keep praying. keep hoping.
Proverbs 13:12
Hope deferred makes the heart sick,
but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life.
Lately....I've been longing for a tree of life.
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